Connection is not just about physical proximity to others.
Connection at work continues to be an area of deep disengagement. Yet companies trying to solve this through forced proximity aren’t winning. We might be thinking too narrowly about what connection is and what helps us experience it. Today we’ll discuss ideas to help broaden our scope and bring a more connective experience to our teams.
Modern Mentor is hosted by Rachel Cooke. A transcript is available at Simplecast.
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Hey, it’s Rachel Cooke, your Modern Mentor. I’m the founder of Lead Above Noise—a firm specializing in helping teams and organizations create better working experiences in service of better results.
I really do believe to my core that how we experience our work has a tremendous impact on the quality and creativity of what we deliver. Like, our employee experiences have a hard and direct impact on business results. My intuition on this is strong.
But you know what organizations don’t love relying on? Um, that would be my – or anyone’s – intuition. Alone. So luckily – but also sadly – for me, I’ve got some hard data to back my point of view here.
Gallup is one of the institutions whose research I follow most closely. They’re pretty dominant in the employee engagement space. And they just released their 2023 State of the Global Workplace Report.
And here are a few things worth knowing. First, according to their research, 23% of the population is thriving, currently at work, while 59% are not engaged and 18% are actively disengaged.
Second, their researchers estimate that low engagement costs the global economy $8.8 trillion.
And third – because these things should be stated in threes – these not engaged or disengaged employees are struggling deeply with connection. Feeling disconnected from team and workplace.
I’ve thought – and talked – a lot about connection over these past few years. I’ve watched it fray. I have heard from clients over and over, “In this new world of work, we can’t seem to figure this one out. How can we rediscover a feeling of connection at work?”
And so I’ve started asking around. Like, just asking people in my world – if remote working isn’t doing it, but also compulsory Tuesdays in the office isn’t doing it – what actually drives our experience of connection?
And what I’ve learned is that we just haven’t been thinking broadly enough. Connection is not just about physical proximity to others. We can feel lonely in a crowd and we can feel connected, alone.
So let’s talk about some pearls of wisdom I’ve been gifted by those around me who’ve been generous enough to share what makes them feel connected.
Here are 5 of my favorite responses I received. And I think if we experiment with all of these, we just may start to see the tide turn in our favor.
I feel connected when…
Because trust is the foundation of everything. We cannot feel connected with a team or person we don’t trust. Which for me means things like – they always do what they say they’ll do. And whatever they’d say with you in the room is the same thing they’d say when you’re not in the room.
So how can leaders really dial up trust on their teams?
Try starting a ritual of asks and offers. Here’s how it works. Leaders, bring your teams together and go around one-by-one. Ask each person, “What is one thing you need right now? (That’s your ask.) and one thing you might offer to a member of the team?”
You might hear things like: “My ask is for someone to help me rehearse for that big client pitch I have coming up. And my offer is to provide real and actionable feedback on something you’ve been struggling with.”
Leaders, really hear the asks and offers. Where you can respond to the ask, take it on. And then, most critically, follow up. Be the person who ensures everyone’s ask has been answered and offer provided.
This will start to drive trust. And in person or remote, I believe it will slowly notch up your team’s sense of connection.
This one, for me, is all about purpose. Teams feel connected when they share a sense of purpose. And I don’t mean a spiritual or existential one. Just a sense that everyone’s work and priorities are collectively in service of the same outcome.
Like if you’re part of a retail team in a store. Are you and your peers all striving for the same main outcome? Like customer satisfaction or store cleanliness or driving sales of a particular product line?
When we all see the same goal in front of us, it brings us together. Makes us feel truly like a team all rowing together.
Leaders, your job here is to articulate a clear and compelling finish line for your whole team to see. And then to help each team member understand how their daily work moves you, collectively, in that direction. Together.
The question of ‘do we or don’t we pull people into the office?’ seems to sit at the heart of the connection question for so many companies.
And I think the opportunity here is to understand physical proximity does not equal connection. When it’s handled well, it can certainly amplify the experience. But when it’s forced without purpose, it can quickly diminish connection.
The key here is to pull people physically together with a purpose.
I spend a lot of my time facilitating leadership development programs and workshops. Before the pandemic it was all in person. During lockdown it was all remote.
Today, it’s a blend. But here’s what I’ve noticed. Coming together, physically, to have a shared learning and coaching experience with the team is something I am seeing people absolutely love. And the connection I watch happen throughout the day is almost tangible.
The more leaders can invite their teams together to achieve or experience something as a cohort, the more connection they will see. So leaders, look around. What needs to be brainstormed or ideated or learned or experimented with? How can you pull your people together with purpose?
And finally. Sometimes we’re just thinking too big when it comes to connection. We want everyone connected with everyone. And that may be too much to expect too soon.
Some people – especially but not exclusively introverts – prefer to build their feeling of connection from the ground up.
For some, having one close and trusted relationship at work is the biggest driver of connection. In fact, Gallups’s Employee Engagement Survey, comprised of only 12 questions, asks respondents whether they have a best friend at work.
So leaders, maybe the opportunity for you is to take a pause on the team events you’ve got planned, and to help your people find just one mentor or buddy or peer coach. And then let those pairs or smaller groups decide for themselves just how they will choose to connect.
Whether or not an idea here has resonated with you, I ask you to note two things. One, what we’re doing today to drive connection just isn’t working. And two, these ideas are not my own – they come from actual people feeling actual disconnection and wishing for something richer.
However you proceed, I wish you all the luck and connection you need.
Join me next week for another great episode. Until then, visit my website at leadabovenoise.com if your organization is looking to dial up its Employee Experience or deliver some leadership development that activates change. You can follow Modern Mentor on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Find and follow me on LinkedIn. Thanks so much for listening and have a successful week.