Many of us have been taught labels are a bad thing. And they can be. But they can also be the key to success if we understand how to use them effectively and for good.
Many of us have been taught labels are a bad thing. And they can be. But they can also be the key to success if we understand how to use them effectively and for good.
Modern Mentor is hosted by Rachel Cooke. A transcript is available at Simplecast.
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Hey, it’s Rachel Cooke, your Modern Mentor. I’m the founder of Lead Above Noise—a firm specializing in activating workplaces. We find your blind spots and opportunities and build you the custom blueprint to get your teams delivering their best work. Efficiently, collaboratively, with full engagement.
Have a question for me? Leave a voicemail at 201.677.8113 and I may respond with an episode – just for you.
When I was a kid, my parents moved us to a town with a really great public school system. I was incredibly fortunate to receive the education I did.
But as is often the case here in the U.S., a town with great public schools is often a town with a lot of disposable income. Which meant for me, growing up, the kids around me were often wearing and carrying things with labels that were totally out of reach for me.
Which meant I grew up with feelings about labels that weren’t so positive. I believed labels to be something designed to make some feel superior and others feel less than. To highlight status and privilege. And those things may still be true.
But also, as I got older and (I seriously hope!) wiser, I’ve discovered an upside to labels. When we understand the power they hold, and we learn to use them for good, they can actually help us achieve big and meaningful things.
Let’s talk today about some of the ways I love using labels as rocket fuel for success.
1. Empower yourself and others with identities that matter
I still remember when my kids (one of whom is now driving and college-hunting) were in pre-school.
I’d pick them up at the end of each day while they were in the middle of clean up time. There was a song they all sang together. I think it came from Barney the Dinosaur. And you’re welcome I will not sing it for you. Because 15 years later I guarantee it will still be triggering.
But my point is this is where I learned an important lesson from the amazing teachers in those classrooms.
When the kids protested, not wanting to switch from play to cleanup, the teachers would remind them of what amazing helpers they all were.
Note, they never asked the kids to help. They intentionally called them “helpers.” And it was a genius move. They were labeling. For good.
Jonah Berger is a marketing professor at the Wharton School of Business, and the author of several books including Magic Words: What to Say to Get Your Way. And he talked to CNBC earlier this year about “turning options into identities.” Which is what these teachers were doing.
Asking kids to do a thing (help) is less likely to trigger action than inviting them to be a thing (a helper).
And yes. It applies to grownups too!
Whether you’re trying to motivate yourself or a team, think not about what you need to do, and instead who you want to be.
I’ve used this on myself many times over the years. I’m not giving a talk. I’m a professional speaker. I’m not doing a Pulse Check. I’m an Activation Expert. These inspire and excite me. They drive me to act more boldly than if I were just working off a to-do-list.
So your turn. Who do you need your team to be? Innovators? Growth strategists? Owners of the patient experience?
Invite them – or yourself – to step into those shoes. And the actions will follow.
2. Drive accountability all the way to 11
We all get frustrated when someone says they’ll do a thing, and then they don’t do it. Amiright?
But sometimes what’s really happening is that the person did do the thing – or at least their version of it. And you just don’t recognize it as that thing. And what we need there is a label.
Like, take my daughter. She’s got some troubles with her Executive Function and she works with a coach to help her develop strategies.
The kiddo complains endlessly about how bad her coach is at her job. “She’s supposed to help me get better at this and she’s not!”
When I ask what the coach is doing with her, the kid says “She just tells me to write things in my planner and check the planner 3 times a day. And to send emails to the teachers when I feel overwhelmed. And to pause and take deep breaths…” and on and on.
And I smile. “Kid,” I say to her, “what do you think help is supposed to look like? She’s not gonna do the work for you.”
All this is to say my daughter is standing by waiting for a silver bullet. Not realizing all these strategies are the help. She just needs to implement them.
So how does this show up in the workplace? Well, I talk to people all the time who tell me their leaders never coach them. Then I talk to leaders who say they’re spending half their days coaching.
The disconnect? People are waiting for a 60-minute calendar invite called “Coaching session” – and not realizing that impromptu chat with their boss in the elevator or after that Zoom call was coaching.
Leaders need to label it.
And people need to do the same for themselves.
Think you’re not learning because you’ve not attended a conference in 5 years? Try catching yourself next time you’re listening to a pod (hey there!) or watching a TED talk or just talking to a colleague in another part of the business offering a fresh perspective.
These all count as learning. You just need to label them as such.
3. Frame opportunity
OK, a lot of kid metaphors today. I’ll own that. But bear with me for one more.
So the same daughter of mine – the one riding the struggle bus – her room tends to be a five-alarm disaster. I’m talking rough.
And for years I’d tell her – then beg, threaten, all the things – to clean it. Nothing worked.
Until I leaned on a label. And it changed the game. (Well, sort of. I mean, nobody’s perfect).
Instead of telling her what to do, I labeled the outcome so it compelled her to act.
I said “let’s make this a room you deserve.” We talked about her being deserving of a bed without trash on it, clothes folded in drawers, not buried under mountains of chaos.
And over time, she found her way there.
So what opportunity do you see for yourself or your team?
Like rather than “OK team, we need to update this project plan,” try “OK team, how are we gonna bring this project to life?”
Or rather than “I know I need to be networking even though I hate it,” can you try a bit of self-talk like “I get to build a coalition of supporters, champions, and mentors who stand behind me?”
Yeah, it might feel a little goopy at first. But give it a try. Or better yet, rather than telling you to give it a try, I’m gonna say “Be your own biggest champion.” You deserve it.
That a helpful start?
Good luck. Get labeling.
Join me next week for another great episode. Until then, visit my website at leadabovenoise.com if your workplace could use an activation boost – a talk, a workshop, a pulse check – you choose. You can follow Modern Mentor on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Find and follow me on LinkedIn. Thanks so much for listening and have a successful week.
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