People are feeling really disappointed by and at work these days. Leaders are making (or not making) choices we don’t love. So how can we constructively manage this disappointment while holding onto our jobs?
People are feeling really disappointed by and at work these days. Leaders are making (or not making) choices we don’t love. So how can we constructively manage this disappointment while holding onto our jobs?
Modern Mentor is hosted by Rachel Cooke. A transcript is available at Simplecast.
Have a question for Modern Mentor? Email us at modernmentor@quickanddirtytips.com.
Find Modern Mentor on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn, or subscribe to the newsletter to get more tips to fuel your professional success.
Modern Mentor is a part of Quick and Dirty Tips.
Links:
https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/
https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/modern-mentor-newsletter
https://www.facebook.com/QDTModernMentor
https://twitter.com/QDTModernMentor
https://www.linkedin.com/company/modern-mentor-podcast/
https://www.leadabovenoise.com/
Hey, it’s Rachel Cooke, your Modern Mentor. I’m the founder of Lead Above Noise—a firm specializing in activating workplaces – helping leaders create the conditions that unleash bigger results while engaging our teams.
The primary way I help companies re-activate their workforces is by talking to their employees – understanding what’s going well and what they need most to perform better.
I love that I get to do this work because it helps me keep a finger on the pulse of what’s happening in all sorts of organizations. There are always trends. And one of the biggest ones I’m seeing right now is disappointment.
People across the board are feeling like their companies are just failing to meet their expectations. Which leaves me wondering – what should our expectations be of our workplace?
There was once a time when companies expected people to work from 9 -5, and people expected in return, a paycheck. That was pretty much it.
Expectations are different all around now. Companies want more from their teams – more hours, more ideas, more loyalty. And employees too want more – they want purpose and support and wellness programs.
So what’s reasonable? And what can we do, as employees, when we’re feeling let down?
Today I’d like to share some of the things I’m hearing from people during Pulse Checks so we can all start to manage our expectations. And maybe even take some action.
1. We don’t feel like a family anymore
This is probably the one I hear most often. It usually means a big change has taken a place. A layoff, an organizational restructure, an acquisition, and people feel a loss. Maybe trust feels broken or old lines of communication aren’t working or new ways of working have been rolled out.
When this conversation comes up, I typically tell leaders they have 2 problems to solve: one problem is the thing that happened that broke trust or communication. But the other problem is the belief that work should feel like a family.
Because I do believe that belief is dangerous.
A family’s care should be unconditional. A business’s should be anything but.
The reality of business – today more than ever – is that hard decisions must get made. We may not always like them, but we should be prepared for them. And when we believe we’re part of a family at work, we’re setting ourselves up for major disappointment.
But while a company has a right to make hard choices, employees have a right to expect respect, empathy, and truth.
So if you’ve seen a hard decision come down at work and you’re feeling bummed, ask yourself: are you disappointed that it happened or how it happened?
And if it’s the how, is there a way you can offer concrete feedback? Was a tough message delivered disrespectfully? Were you not given enough time to prepare for something? Is a newly required way of working making it hard to get your job done? Find a leader or HR person to talk to – even if not your own.
But if you reflect and discover you’re just feeling sad, then know that I’m really sorry. These things are hard. But it is, in fact, a part of working life in the 2020’s.
2. The company isn’t expressing support for my cause
This is another one that’s come up a lot lately.
In years (or decades) past, there was an unwritten rule that politics didn’t enter the conversation at work. Which basically meant discussions of politicians and policy were off limits.
Today, though, what even is “politics”? For some – for many – it’s kind of everything. It’s war, humanity, social justice, the environment…and it’s hard to avoid completely.
And many companies have entered the conversation. When something significant in the world happens – that some may label as “politics” - many companies will issue a statement – internal and/or external – taking a position.
Problem is, sometimes not all employees agree with the position taken. And in some cases, may even feel excluded or disrespected by a public statement their company made.
Other times, a statement isn’t made at all. And some employees feel ignored or slighted by the absence of public comment.
On this one, I advise organizations to be really careful. To have a clear set of principles around when they speak up and when they don’t. And to have a committee of sensitivity readers with diverse representation before they hit send.
And if you’re a disappointed citizen, I just remind you that even our leaders are fallible. So give feedback, but do it as gently as you can. Unless something explicitly offensive was said, assume the error was a misstep or an oversight, and take this opportunity to educate rather than attack.
3. No one cares about burnout
So, perhaps naively, I really thought the whole Great Resignation and the Quiet Quitting and all the relevant hashtags would do their job to wake us up. But honestly, I think people are more overworked and overwhelmed today than before!
And I’m worried for everyone.
People will hang on for a while. But not forever.
So if you’re feeling overwhelmed, and bummed it seems no one is paying attention? You are right to expect more!
Here are a few things you can do:
4. There’s no team building happening
Because we’re working in all sorts of ways (remote, hybrid) and we’re all running at a million miles an hour.
Part of the burnout problem is the sheer volume of work. But part of it also is the lack of anything really restorative – like fun and connective.
If this is the source of your big disappointment, then friend – my recommendation is to pick up the ball and just get it rolling.
Yeah, sometimes we picture team building as a set of trust falls or a team paintball sesh or a happy hour or choose your organized thing.
But it can look like anything we want it to be. So what’s one thing you can do – I mean like, today – to shift this reality?
Pick a book you’ve been dying to read and invite your team to do the same with you.
Or start a Google doc with your favorite self-care strategies and invite your team to add to it. So you all have a bunch to play with.
Or find out when there will next be critical mass in the office and show up that day even if nothing on your calendar demands you do so.
This one is hard. We’re all feeling a need to team. But there are things within your control. So take a baby step and hope others will follow.
These are complicated times for sure. And if you’re wading through a season of gloom, I hope you’re feeling less alone and maybe a tiny bit empowered to make a change.
Join me next week for another great episode. Until then, visit my website at leadabovenoise.com if your workplace could use an activation boost – a talk, a workshop, a pulse check – you choose. You can follow Modern Mentor on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Find and follow me on LinkedIn. Thanks so much for listening and have a successful week.
Modern Mentor is a Quick and Dirty Tips podcast. It's audio-engineered by Dan Feirabend. Our Director of Podcasts is Brannan Goetschius. Our Podcast and Advertising Operations Specialist is Morgan Christianson. Our Digital Operations Specialist is Holly Hutchings. Our Marketing and Publicity Assistant is Davina Tomlin, and Kamryn Lacy is our marketing contractor.